my life is crazy 2day..... crazy in a good way.... i think.....
well.... when i'm bored.... u know i intend 2 do crazy things.... n yes i do it again.... hahaha!!!! i even make miera crazy just like me.... am i just great or what???? hehehe.....
danish is crazy to.... he let me used his things..... its way weird..... he smiled at me.... he let my use his lap top..... cause my dad wants 2 sold mine.... n buy the new one..... after pmr..... how long is it going 2 be????? 4 month IN HELL!!!!! URFGH!!!!!
Monday, June 29, 2009
urgh!!!! i'm stressed out!!!! damn it!!!! pmr is in 98 days.... n i still don't get anything about math.... damn it!!!! damn math!!!! damn me!!!! owh.... y is it so hard 4 me to understand it.....
farhana a.k.a dugong.... is really like A FUCKING BITCH!!!! URGH!!! i hate her!!!! hate her!!!! hate her!!!! she's now liking amier.... when we're at school.... she's like calling amier.... with her so called cute voice.... "amier......." EEEWWW!!!!! that bitch..... urgh!!!! y am i jealous of her anyway????? aish!!!! am i liking amier???? i think its just the illusion of the heart..... just like what minah said.....
haha!!!! i watched this new trailer movie.... a malay horror movie.... damn ass!!!! it is SUPER SCARY!!!! aish!!!! its Skrip 7707 damn!!!! its only the trailer.... and i was scared like hell.... and i was watching it.... in daylight.... but i was scared like hell.... i'm so scared..... i don't know how i'm supposed to sleep tonight.... aish!!!! i should never watched that trailer.... argh!!!! if my dad knows i'm scared like hell.... he will probably take advantage of it.... like making me scream my head out when he close my bedroom light.... better make sure he doesn't know this....
well.... since few days ago.... i've been writing this fic.... its involved Kara, Suju, DBSK n SS501..... well.... i have readers and people like the fic!!!! i am so ultimately happy!!!! i never thought people would actually like the fic.... i'm so so so happy.... i just want to share this happiness with everyone.... i know its not a big deal at all.... but i'm really happy.... b-coz its my first attempt to write a fic.... so its a very big deal for me.... i hope many people would read it.... and like it.... here's the link:
well.... my day is ok at school.... some embarrassed things happen.... but yeah.... its me we're talking about.... if i don't embarrassed myself 4 a day.... then it wouldn't be me....
there's some awkwardness at school.... amier was kind off act cold towards me.... i'm not sure either its only my feelings or he really does act cold towards me.... i can't blame him.... i'm not taking him seriously enough....
i saw abg trofi like so many times today.... i think miera saw him 2.... but she isn't react towards him at all.... i felt kind off bad.... miera treat abg trofi like that.... b-coz of me.... she read my blog..... so she know my real feelings.... but i felt bad now....
at the last period of class today.... we have to arrange some chairs and tables.... i let the boys do all the work.... suprisingly.... its amier who does all the work.... i just let him be.... i just stare out of the window n started 2 think about cable guy n cfo.... well.... i hate seeing cfo so happy with other girls.... i'm jealous of it.... and i'm missing cable guy like hell this few days.... when i started to mumble.... "I really miss u cable guy...." then the wind started to blown so aggrasively.... i was shocked.... i always thought cable guy as the wind who always follow my every step..... then i started to cried.... gosh!!!! i cried without a reason....
then i got back home.... n guess what.... i saw danish smiling happily looking at me.... like wth???? i hate it when he act nicely.... it gave me creeps.... eddie said that he always act weird after he brooke up with his gf.... he must be sad.... i felt sorry 4 him.... but in ay way.... i want him 2 stop treating me so nicely!!!! i hate it!!!! it felt wrong n creepy!!!!
i'm not going to school 2day!!!! hehehe.... its a quiet nice day 4 me..... but not that nice..... since danish is in my life.... so my life could never get that nice.....
watch Transformers Revenge Of The Fallen.... only one word could come out.... WOOOOOOOOW!!!! that was THE MOST GREATEST MOVIE I'VE EVER SEEN!!!! my eyes were like addicted to that movie..... omg!!!! i really advice u guys to go and watch it.... it's really is a well made movie..... its better then the first one....
danish broke up with his gf.... ike WHAT????!!!! Y????!!!! hmm.... is it b-coz of me???? plz don't be b-coz of me.... cause i like his gf.... urgh!!!! no wonder he's been acting really weird lately..... see!!!! there's must be something going on in his life.... that's y he is nice 2wards me..... but he still don't want me 2 be friendly with amier.... that guy is weird..... hey.... i'm ur little sister.... not ur gf.... so i can be with anyone i want 2 be with..... n don't worry.... i wont be with amier.... at least not yet..... hehehe.....
hearing that name.... makes me all stressed out!!!! damn that guy!!!! y does he need 2 add another 'love story' in my almost dramatic life..... urgh!!!! God!!!! i wish all of this would just stop.....
what adynn n minah said yesterday is true after all..... amier do ask me out..... but y???? n y does it have 2 be 2morrow???? i have a so called date with my idiotic so called big brother.... its danish.... he said that starting from now on.... i'm his little sister.... and i have 2 follow everything he said.... this is all because i told him about amier.... he suddenly got mad.... n said i can't go with amier.... n i ask y..... then he said from now on, i'm his little sister n i must follow everything he said.... WTH?????!!!! last week.... he was a COMPLETE JERK.... then he was A SWEET GUY.... now.... he's my SO OVER PROTECTIVE BIG BROTHER..... can't my life be any better????
few years back.... my life was by a guy that i still can't 4get until now.... its cable guy.... then cfo comes into the picture.... after that.... danish arrived giving me a complete hatred at him.... now.... amier suddenly pops out of nowhere.... even though he is kind of cute.... but.... he's just not it.... i mean.... if he really want 2 ask me out.... he should ask me himself.... not by his friends.... i don't like guy like that.... he needs 2 be a little bit more brave....
I'm SOOOO ULTIMATELY TIRED!!!! gosh!!!! i felt like killing somebody..... ok..... at school.... things are ok....
minah and adynn said.... amier ask me out..... like WTH????!!!! Amier Nelson ask me out???? y???? and i don't believe my 2 beloved friends.... its just not true.... y would that malay mix british guy wants 2 date me???? it doesn't make any sense AT ALL!!!!
miera said that i intends 2 talk about CFO.... like A LOT!!!! y is it???? i thinks i love him.... but minah said.... its just the illusion of my heart.... its because i've waited cable guy 4 2 long.... so my heart needs a new hope.... minah is the new doktor cinta.... huhuhu.....
dnish is acting weird and weirder..... his friends keep on teasing me.... but he actually stand up 4 me.... is he crazy???? this is SOOOOO NOT MAKING ANY SENSE..... he kept asking me weird question like.... "Qis, what do u think about me?"..... "Qis, do u hate me?"....... "Qis, would u accept me as ur bf?"..... urgh!!!!! this is so not making sense at all!!!!
its Hot Issue from 4 Minutes.... its SUPER FUNKY.... i really really like it.... love it.... addicted to it.... even though a lot of people say they r copying 2NE1.... i don't care.... they r just 2 cute to copy 2NE1 style.... just don't hate them.... they r SOOOO COOOOL!!!! check it out.... miera.... give ur comment 2 me about this song 2morrow ok....
urgh!!!! y i kept seeing him???? every where i looked.... he would always pop out in the image.... urgh!!!! its like CFOlism suddenly striking my life.... this start to give me a headache....
y am i so stressed about this???? it is because i knew.... that a lot of girl are craving for him.... and if that girls know i'm so in to him.... things will turn really ugly.... n i don't want that.... i have enough problems.... and i don;t want to add another one into it....
CFO is really getting attention right now.... i mean.... more and more girls are liking him.... few girls in my class are like crazy for him.... when they saw him.... they will be like.... "OMG!!! HE IS SO HOOOOOT!!!!" just like what i used to act before.... actually.... when i heard them saying things like that.... it makes me jealous.... but i'm sure his gf will be MORE MORE JEALOUS then i am.... i mean who won't right....
this is another day.... full of cfo.... darn it!!!! urgh!!!! y is this happen 2 me???? he is so pain in the back.... GO AWAY CFO!!!!
my friends keep teased me.... about amier.... u\i don't like it.... cause i don't like him.... just stop it ok.... i really.... really have no feelings towards him.... so don't teased me again....
well.... else then that.... every things seems 2 be fine.... its all ok....
i flunk math AGAIN!!!! HUA!!!! this is so depressing.... i hate math.... but i have to score it.... in order 2 get 8A in PMR.... this doesn't look good.... i have to try my best.... do more.... and try to score math....
well.... the other exam paper.... was ok.... got A in PI, Sej and BI.... the usual subject.... its ok.... i'll work harder next time....
cfo is like every where today.... that guy really don't know how to make an entrance is he.... i'm not in a good mood.... n i can only saw him.... every where i go.... this is so stressing.... if i only saw him.... then it doesn't matter so much.... but he is with other girl.... it makes me A LOT MORE DEPRESSED AND STRESS!!!! can't he just banish or something????
my friend keeps bullied me..... poor me.... always be the one who get bullied.... they even teased me.... calling me Mrs. Nelson.... bonda.... umi.... Qistina Bachan..... danias gf.... that isSO DISGUSTING!!!! EEEWWWWW!!!! y would i want 2 be.... gf of the person that make me so late to school today.... it just doesn't make sense 4 me 2 fall 4 him.... he is SO TOTALLY NOT MY TYPE!!!!
back to school.... after that very long 2 weeks of school break.... the school finally starts!!!! yipee!!!! that torturing school holiday.... is finally over.... thank God!!!!
datin is now puan seri.... hahaha!!!! congrats Puan Seri Mazlilah.... fighting!!!! keep up the good work.... i hope u'll do good things at our school....
cfo is like everywhere today.... any where i looked.... cfo will be there.... i guess the 2 weeks without seeing him.... is finally pay of.... i see him like every minute of that school session today.... huhuhu.... isn't that just great.... yes it is....
adynn got back from indonesia.... she brought us some souvenirs... i got a necklace.... same as miera, minah, fara.... huhuhu.... nice.... tq adynn!!!!
everything went well.... its all cool.... except for minah making me her personal 'tukang urut' and my friends.... keep gossiping me with amier.... urgh!!!! don't want 2 talk about him.... .
this past few nights.... i keep on getting this dream.... the same dream.... about this guy.... who i don't even know who.... its someone i didn't know.... and this dream.... keep going the same way.... i was in my waiting for bus at the bus stop.... then this guy came.... he doesn't even look at me.... he only sat beside me.... and then gone just like that.... what the hell is that dream meant.... and every time i woke up.... i get a headache.... its hard for me.... not knowing what the dream meant.... and keep getting a headache.... this is painful.... because of all this dream.... right now.... i've become a good daughter.... i do all of the house work.... without anyone asking me to.... i think i'm going crazy....
the things that drive me more crazy is.... danish.... he is such pain in the ass.... he keep on bugging me.... he said i need 2 help him.... get his gf back.... wth???? do i look like a person 2 always be used by others???? crazy guy!!!!
today.... i learn how 2 make a karipap.... yipee!!!! it looks weird.... but still good.... the taste is ok.... 4 a first timer.... i'm quiet good.... hehehe....
hope i'll be good at it one day.... maybe i could become a chef or something.... just maybe.... huhuhu....
today.... i go out with some people.... including miera.... we wanted 2 watch Terminator Salvation.... we get 2 watch.... it WAS AWESOME!!!! but that isn't the thing i want 2 talk about....
i met cable guy today.... when i was about 2 buy movie tickets.... my heart start pumping so hard.... i have butterflies in my stomach.... i can't see anything but him.... all my attention draws towards him....
my heart told me 2 go and talk 2 him.... n let him know how much i miss him.... but my mind don't let me.... it control my body 2 run away from him.... maybe its the best.... cause i'll get hurt if i talk 2 him again.... my heart wont survive if i got hurt one more time....
that time.... i only think about him.... nothing else seems 2 exist.... its like.... every one of my memory about him.... come back.... every memory that i thought.... i have 4gotten....
but something quiet funny happen when i was buying the movie tickets.... cable guy was like a few feet away from me.... so i can't think straight.... n i go buy the tickets at a counter.... some cute guy was there.... i said something like this.... " 2 kids ticket n 2 children"..... isn't that the same???? that cute guy was laughing.... so cute.... then he tease me.... well.... it did take my head of cable guy 4 a while....
but after that.... cable guy is the only thing i can think about.... i thought i have 4gotten about him.... i thought i don't love him anymore.... i thought i love CFO.... but i was wrong.... SO WRONG!!!! i guess cable guy is so hard 2 4get.... cable guy is half of me.... so how can i 4get about myself????
this is a great song.... sad song.... a song that make me remind of my past.... a song that make me feel so guilty.... yet so stupid.... its Good Person.... by T-ara....
this song is about a girl.... using this certain guy.... 2 torture.... her used 2 be bf/someone that she love.... the story is actually same as my life.... i used 2 love cable guy like crazy.... but he never notice it.... n just like throwing me away.... then i met my first love.... The Perfect Guy..... he is still in love with me.... so i decide 2 accept him in my life.... n i used him 2 make cable guy regret throwing me away.... people keep saying.... i'm happy 2 have The Perfect Guy in my life.... but i'm not.... i tried 2 hurt cable guy using The Perfect Guy.... but in the end.... i'm the one who suffer the most.... cable guy doesn't feel anything.... n The Perfect Guy left me.... after he realize.... i only use him.... now he is no where 2 be found.... i'm such a bad person.... stupid me.... well... its all in the past now.... here's the song.... listen 2 it.... hope u'll like it....
well.... i just finish watching some korean star learning/speaking english.... it is SUPER FUNNY!!!! the first one that i watch was.... tvxq.... xiah junsu english.... OMG!!!! he is so funny!!!! micky english was so good.... it makes xiah look so stupid.... hehehe.... but i still love him.... second was super junior.... its like SUPER DUPER FUNNY!!!! omg!!!! its like so funny until i can't stop laughing.... KiBum english was fantastic.... siwon was ok.... but the others.... its like super suck.... but that's what makes it funny.... i like it.... well.... when ther learn english with this some daniel teacher.... it lokks like teaching kindergarten kids.... even my lil cousin can speak better then them.... no offense.... but they need 2 improve more in their english.... but over all... it was S0000 FUN!!!! actually.... it makes me 4get alll my problem 4 a moment.... thnks tvxq n super junior!!!!
this is the first time in my ALMOST SO DRAMATIC life..... I HATE SCHOOL HOLIDAY!!!! this school holiday is..... SO ULTIMATELY BORING!!!! its only 4 day.... but i felt like dying in boringness..... urgh!!!! my parents r so busy.... leaving me with my other siblings at home.... doing so called nothing!!!! all i do this holiday is.... watch tv.... hearing some stupid jokes by danish.... n stare at this computer 4 almost all day..... is there anything else i can do???? well.... actually i could go study.... since pmr is so fucking near.... i should do some study.... but my brain just can't accept it.... its still suffer from TO MUCH STUDYING.... aish!!!! ok.... i'll study after my brain got it strength back..... like that's going 2 happen.... hehehe....
what should i do the rest of this VERY LONG holiday???? hmm.... still thingking about it.... i know!!!! i will make a world record..... by sleeping so long..... that sound like dying..... NEXT!!!! watching tv all day long sound good.... but my eye sight will be effected.... NO WAY!!!! I want 2 be a pilot.... so i can't ruin my eye sight..... i think i know what i'm gonna do.... read the 1 thousand million fanfics.... that i never finish..... then learn some korean..... n watch drama at mysoju.... GREAT!!!! i'm sure my holiday will be full of doing things that will damaged my brain.... that's sounds perfectly like NORQISTINA AKMAR..... HUAHUAHUA!!!!
when we fall in love.... we intend 2 do stupid things.... right???? we'll act crazily 4 our love one.... n even do anything 4 them.... people intend 2 do stupid things when they're in love.... some would sacrifice their self 4 the one they love....
well.... i guess i never done anything 4 my love.... i never really fight 4 it.... maybe because i always things that i'm not suitable 4 the one that i love.... i always look down at myself.... that's my prob.... maybe that's y i'm always lose.... the love of my life.... cable guy.... abg t.... abg f.... n recently.... cfo.... how much must i lose in order 4 me 2 gain some faith in myself????
rara.... my super lovable bff.... that killed herself after she broke up with her dumb ass bf.... she is such a stupid asshole!!!! y did she killed herself 4 that guy???? y???? but at least she brave enough 2 show that she really love him.... n will do anything 4 him.... what about me???? the only thing i've ever done 4 the one i love is.... let go.... that's me.... huh..... i guess i need 2 find some strength 2 fight 4 my love.... if not.... i'll be single till death.... hahahah!!!!
its tvxq new song.... its SOOO GOOD!!!! i really like em.... Junsu is the one who composed n write the lyrics.... he is so talented.... so as the other tvxq members.... here's the song n its translation....
Since the day you left without saying goodbye. I feel like only the scent of this street's scenery has changed. I wanted to be everything to you (and) the promise I gave you too Which I couldn't keep has Changed into a memory If I had run to you at that time, When you were standing alone crying Would you still be by my side? If I could, I want to tell you one more time That I love you my hearts desires for you and my words can't reach you anymore (credit for this line: gerasiafan) Chorus: Wherever you are, whoever you're with I wonder what you are wearing, what you are doing that makes you laugh I'm here, I'm still here I believe that two of us will meet again
I haven't changed my mind I only think of you when you appear in my thoughts with your hair tied up behind you I have mistaken someone else from behind many times thinking it was you Whenever the telephone rings, I keep hoping that it's you I spend everyday pathetically I say I can't forget you but that's a lie Truthfully, I don't want to forget you It's useless for me to pretend that I don't care anymore (Because) without you, I can't feel happy about anything No matter how much I try, I can't stop the tears from flowing Chorus: Wherever you are, whoever you're with I wonder what you're wearing, what you're doing that makes you laugh I'm here, I'm still here I believe the two of us will meet again End Chorus
That's why, I'm here alone again Calling out your name I can't live holding onto this sadness But that's all I can do Just by being there You were a ray of light Even though that time will not come again Whatever may happen, whateverelse I'm doing I definitely don't want to forget The truth, that I loved you Chorus: Wherever you are, whoever you're with whatever you dream of, whatever you're doing that's making you laugh I will be here forever, I am still here I believe I will meet you (again) someday
I haven't changed my mind I'm only thinking of you I haven't changed my mind I'm only thinking of you
